Naming the stoma...

[Jason_D]

Another one of our popular ostomy polls. This time we're asking if have given your stoma a name, or will be naming it once you have it.

If you do have a name for your stoma, please feel free to share the name with us and why you chose that particular name.

If you havent named it, please also feel free to explain why you havent or wont name it.

If you yourself dont have an ostomy, but your partner does, please still feel free to join in with the poll. Answer it on behalf of your partner! Go on, we'll let you just this once....

Any other comments on this subject is welcome too!

Look forward to reading your responses.

Jason_D

[Jason_D]

I personally have not named my stoma. However I appreciate that I seem to be in the minority as far as online ostomists go. You often see people talking about "spurty" or "freddie" or "jemima" for example.

I actually have a concern about people naming their stoma, and I know this might shock some people to read this (nothing like controversy to strike up a good convo!) but I feel that naming your stoma is a sign of non-acceptance deep down.

You dont name your leg. You dont name your ears. You dont name your arms. So why name your stoma? Surely by doing this you are seperating your stoma from the rest of your body? Maybe this is why people name it, because it gives them a sense of comfort that the stoma isnt part of their body, its a gate crasher to the party.

I appreciate that lots of people find giving their stoma a name a great way to adjust to it. And casually naming it is fine in my eyes - it can be a great way of talking about the stoma with kids for example, or to family. But to actually start to generate a personality for the stoma really concerns me at times.

To be honest for a moment, I had never heard of the naming-your-stoma concept until I joined the online ostomy community. My previous Nurse never mentioned it to me and when I talked to her about it she too does not agree with it - hence not suggesting to me I do it when I had it done.

That said my stoma does get the odd name every so often. Usually when im swearing at it whilst it's leaking

Please do feel free to totally disagree with me here and explain why you think I'm wrong. I'd love to hear your thoughts from a different perspective.

See ya!

Jason.

[Kathy_from_England]

ohhh, I'll disagree with you Jase! ;D

First of all we DO have names for other body parts...you have typed this message with your little pinky (at least I hope you did... )

But more importantly, I think naming a stoma can be a sign of acceptance.
It makes it seem more friendly.
It takes away some of the fear.
It can be referred to in polite company.

Sorry Jase, I'm confident you'll be in minority with this one.....

<off to the chatroom to find some boxing gloves>

[Sean]

I am not sure who named my stoma "Stinky", but I do suspect it was Maryann. She definitely named my scar, bag and mucous fistula though!!!

I do think a lot of people name their stoma out of embarassment. People don't like naming body parts that produce waste fluids. Look at the various names and euphimisms used for genitalia. The names could be a social thing to avoid sounding too "crude"!

I do see where you are coming from Jason. Some people may be naming their stoma because they are trying to hide the harsh reality that they have a bit of intestine attached to their side. This makes it seem more like a friendly creature than a bit of bowel.

We really need a psychologist's opinion on this. I wonder if I could tempt over that nice young trainee one from Shaz's board

Sean

[KiminCalif]

I agree with you, Jason. I call my stoma 'Lil Squirt". I agree with you because I haven't accepted this infuriating "Lil Squirt". It's simply much more civilized to call it that than the crude names I used to refer to it before(as Sean said). Or, what would a psychologist say because I just kept referring to "It".? The thing. Here comes the hostility! "Lil Squirt" is easier for me.
Kim in Calif

[Demmie]

My stoma was christened Bilbo -after Bilbo Baggins - Tolkien was all the rage at the time ;D

For me it was very much part of making friends with my stoma and dealing with it in a manner I could relate to, it helped me accept and deal with it initially especially in the early days.

Kind regards
Demmie

[ieMaryann]

Jason,

I can see where you are coming from on this issue....ie naming the stoma is a way of separating it from you, thus non-acceptance.

I named Sean's stoma and I have NO DOUBT it would not have been named left up to him (altho he might now consider 'Peter Simon' appropriate)

Anyway

Sean's stoma only got its name as a result of, er, ahem. other body parts being named!!
I think I have already said too much.
Just thought I'd have to be contradictory

Maryann

[julima]

I think the reason I named my stomas is because I have two of them, and they can't both be "It"!

So when I tell my daughter "Lucky" is leaking, she knows it's a simple mop-up job ...... but when "Winnie" (the Poo) leaks she knows it's time to disappear. ;D

Julie XXX

[tomc]

Have not named my stoma and do not plan to. My three children know that daddy has a "bag" and we are going to leave it as that.

I will say that my wife has been extremely supportive and tells me that my new addition is just another part of me that she will love. Without her and this type of support I would be months behind where I am now with the "bag".

Naming a stoma seems silly to me and I want to take my change and the transition involved with it seriously as I have some serious concerns about life with an ileostomy and how it will affect my activities, career and well being. It's not something I want to joke around about and would prefer to channel the energy in dealing with set backs and adjusting to losing the ability to wear a swim suit at the pool or just be without a shirt. I have an ileostomy above the belt line and am dealing with how I will dress and getting all new clothes that are loose and will allow me to wear pants. Not trying to be a grouch, but the stoma is not my friend and I don't have any body parts named in the last 40 years. I hope to return to my job and previous sports activities with the same performance level I had before the surgery. I'm only six weeks outside of a pouch removal and permanent ileostomy and still trying to adjust to the appliance and the leaking, irritation, appearance, and noises. Looking forward to feeling better and getting on with my life.

[angie]

;D
Hi I am angie,
I have had my ileostomy now for 8 week and have had problems also ajusting with having a new body part, untill my phyc one day told me if you make friend with it it is easyer to accept, and it has I called it a buddy and we do get on well most of the time, yes I also have probs with burned skin and blistering at times well thats all part of it and it usully is what i have eaten before hand that has made the problem worse. I only get one days weare out of my bag but thats ok, I shower dayly anyways and its nice to have a clean bag on after a shower. I have not changed what I wear at all exept I dont wear tops with the middle showing but I only had 3 of them. and i still wear a one piece swim suite no one seems to notice, so hell why not. they dont know unless you tell them. positive attitude is whats getting me through. I do have my down days when i wonder what did I do to deserver this. But my surgen told me after my opp if I would of left it I would not be here in 6 months time so i have been given a second chance and i am going for it. I have been sick for 20 years and its great to feel alive again.
keep smilying angie

[melissa]

I named my stoma Betsy, can't tell you how I got the name. But it was the 1st word that came out when I was changing the bag the 1st time, and she was not acting like I wanted her too. So I said come on Betsy. I didn't what to call her in dirty names... Besides I think my mom was here. lol

Melissa