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Post by Terry on Oct 30, 2003 23:36:24 GMT -5
Hello all, I'm very new at this. I am scheduled for a Colostomy on the 3rd of November and after seeing what it looks like, I am scared to death. Surgery is the only option for me since my body is no longer responding to medications. I am a retired Airborne Ranger (disabled vet) and can't beleive that I am having such fears for this procedure. I know I need it and I know that it will make the pain go away (eventually) however, my mind still drifts towards trying the medication a little longer. Is this fear normal? I am scared that this thing will ruin my life. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
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Post by wifeof03 on Oct 30, 2003 23:54:41 GMT -5
I can't say I personally know what you are going through but my husband has a colostomy 6 weeks ago, it can be very frightening on both sides, please make sure you have a good surgeon, ask questions, get a 2nd opinion. I stress this because this is very important. You have come to the right place for support. This is a wonderful board full of supportive and caring people. I wish I could offer you some magical solution to your fear, but I can not. I know my husbands first surgery lasted about 2 hours. care for the colostomy is every day but in time you grow used to doing it. at first I did all the care for my husbands but now I just change his barriers when he showers and he does the rest himself. I would hope that you have a good support system around you to help you through these coming weeks. Please feel free to e-mail me.
Valerie
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Post by Kathy_from_England on Oct 31, 2003 3:08:38 GMT -5
Hi and Welcome Terry!
Yes your fears are perfectly normal!! In fact I would be worried if you didn't have any fears. Many people here will have felt exactly the same.
It is also normal to want to give the meds 'just one more try'...many people feel this way.
The colostomy won't ruin your life I can assure you. I imagine you are in pain, maybe tied to the bathroom, maybe unable to live a social life? All these things will change once you adapt to your colostomy.
A lot of fear is due to the unknown. Why don't you put down some of your fears here and we can help you with them?
Also the chatroom is open 24/7 - main chat is Sat 8pm UK time (there's a clock to help you convert to your timezone) but there's usually someone around every evening UK time.
(((Hugs)))
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VegasBagBoy
Posted a few msgs
40 GWM colostomy due to CD when I was 17
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Post by VegasBagBoy on Oct 31, 2003 4:04:16 GMT -5
Hi Terry,
What you are feeling absolutely normal. You're going in for surgery, and you know you will be different when you come out. But here's the good news. It will end the suffering, it will end having to take all those meds that aren't working, you will feel AMAZINGLY better and there is nothing you can't do with an ostomy that you couldn't do before! The only limits are the ones you place on yourself. I have had a colostomy since I was 17 and I'm 40 now. Have traveled the world, scuba dived and even been on a flying trapeze ;D and all with the ostomy!
I agree you should have an excellent surgeon who has alot of experience doing these, and also that you should have a good support system of family and friends you can lean on and who will tell you that you are the same person as before. Only now you won't have to know where every toilet is in town!
Good luck and I hope you have a speedy recovery! Keep us updated.
Nathan
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Post by julima on Oct 31, 2003 4:17:18 GMT -5
Hi Terry, and welcome!  Like you (like everyone!) pre-op I was scare stiff ..... but I can honestly say since getting my colostomy + urostomy seven months ago, life has been better than it has for years! I wouldn't turn the clock back. The biggest problem for most of us is finding the combination of pouch/paste/skin barrier/whatever that works for us - we're all different, and it can take a fair amount of experimentation to hit on that magic combination - but most of us do, eventually. This is made much easier by good siting of the stoma, and a decent "spout" (around 1" after it has settled down post-op). Do you have access to a stoma/ET nurse who can help you to "mark the spot" for the surgeon, taking into account skin dips & creases, clothing etc? OK, it'll be painful for a while (make sure you ask for pain relief when you need it - doesn't make you a cissy ;D ), and uncomfortable for maybe three months - but once you're over that hill (plenty of rest is necessary here!!!!) you'll feel good again, and ready to get on with your life. Good luck for the big day, and come back to let us know how you're doing, ok? (((HUGS))) Julie XXX |
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Demmie
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Post by Demmie on Nov 1, 2003 5:19:36 GMT -5
Hi Terry The unknown is always daunting . If you are in a lot of pain at present this can also bring fears of its own which will cloud most rational thoughts that you have about preparing for the operation and your situation afterwards. Ask for a stoma nurse to discuss stoma sites with you - and also to familiarise you with the wide range of products available to you to manage your stoma after the operation. Try and find a stoma site with no skin folds and where you can wear a waist band /trouser band comfortable over it . Some of the two part systems have large *baseplates* that can sometimes rest/ sit higher up towards the waist band - same applies to underwear as well - In my case hipsters were definately out for a while ! A spout or an *outtie* I think if you can arrange for one will give you less problems in the management stakes afterwards. Almost all of my problems were caused by my *innie* or recessed stoma - and the fact it was an emergency proceedure with no forward planning . The pain does go away , and stomas are manageable - you only have to look around this board to see what can be aceheived by the way of normal and active lives. I am fitter and more active now than I was pre op - and swim and row with no problems at all. Maybe try to see the colostomy as extending your life ( it saved mine ) , look forward to a relief from the pain - and having to know where every loo is in town . It can be a shock - especially if it arrives unannounced - but good preparation , and good siting and familiarisation with the bags, seals, wafers, systems goes a long way to easing those fears. Good Luck Kind regards Demmie |
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porter
Im new!
yabba dabba doooooooo
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Post by porter on Nov 1, 2003 5:53:07 GMT -5
Hi Terry,
I wish you well with your operation and when you get home and feeling well again let us know how you are getting on,
I think as Vagasbagboy has said it all and the other advice you have had, I had my Ileostomy almost 3yrs ago but I wish I had said DO IT 9yrs ago as my life has realy turned around, I am in full time work at a local Hospital And the only problems I get is with leakage due most of the time by overdoing it at work. So I am sure you will be fine, we all know what you must be going through, I now help run "FRIENDS" East Coast Ostomy Support Group, this is for all Ostomist and its wonderfull to see the releaf on the members faces when they sort out there problems with the help of those who are in the same boat. By the way the Queen mum had a Colostomy and she had a great life.
Again do't worry, Best regards Chris.
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Post by Terry on Nov 1, 2003 22:51:40 GMT -5
Thanks to all of you. Time is getting close for my surgery. I will be admitted for pre-op in about 12 hours. I look forward to a speedy recovery and will share my experience. Once again, Thanks to all of you. Talk to you soon....
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Post by Kathy_from_England on Nov 2, 2003 4:25:02 GMT -5
Good luck Terry!!
We'll be thinking of you.
When you're out of hospital we'll all be here to help you adjust to your new friend.
(((Hugs)))
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Post by Terry on Nov 19, 2003 13:57:10 GMT -5
;D Hello all, well I am back home and loving life. I had an Ileostomy done on Tuesday the 4th of Nov, and was released from the hospital that Friday. I have been staying with family for the past couple of weeks. I just had my staples removed today and I am in the process of moving back home (been staying with family). I will be having my next surgery next month (pull-thru) which will attach my stoma to my rectum also using a "J-pouch". Not sure what it all means but because of my quick recovery, Doctors want to go ahead and get it out of the way. Fine with me, supposed to make me almost normal (as normal as you can be without a colon). Take care everyone and thanks for all of your support.
Terry
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Post by KiminCalif on Nov 19, 2003 21:08:22 GMT -5
Terry, how wonderful you are home and happy. You sound so great it's wonderful to see. Please continue to post. you are now "experienced" and can help so much with others who are comtemplating surgery.
Congratulations!
Kim in Calif
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Post by Kathy_from_England on Nov 20, 2003 13:53:01 GMT -5
Terry,
Am so glad everything's gone so well for you!
You may want to check out this site:
www.j-pouch.org
It's a great site with lots of info and a good message board!
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Demmie
Posted a few msgs
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Post by Demmie on Nov 21, 2003 10:09:18 GMT -5
Thats brilliant news ......... I like good news days here Demmie |
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Post by Terry on Nov 26, 2003 4:09:55 GMT -5
Just a quick note... On my way to Florida for my family reunion (haven't seen family in 2 years - thanks to military). Just wanted to wish everyone a very happy thanksgiving. Best of holiday wish's!!!
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